Friday, December 14, 2007

I have some news to share that I wish I didn't...

Grampa has about 2 weeks to live...
 
As you know I picked Grampa up the week of Thanksgiving and we took him up to the high desert house... In the last couple of months, every time we would arrive at his house, Grampa has been in bed... sitting up reading the paper but lately always in bed... When Candice and I arrived to pick him up for Thanksgiving weekend he wasn't ready, still in  PJ's in bed [it was 2pm]
 
Grampa has a GREAT caretaker, her name is Marlo and she is from Brazil... Dad loves her because she sounds like his Mother with the Portuguese accent... [She lives at Grampa's full time]  I adore Marlo she is the cutest little thing youve ever seen... about 58 or 59 but looks like she is early 40's with an adorable little body and just cute as can be... One day Sam and I went to see Grampa, so Marlo ran to the bank while we were there... Anyway she was wearing blue camouflage pants, with cute heels and a shirt that said 'Mama Mia' and a little jacket... it was the cutest outfit on her I swear...
 
That day Grampa says "Some people think there is hanky panky going on but there isn't" 
Later I retold that comment to Sam and he said "I wish I would have heard him say that because I would have said WHY THE HELL NOT are you slippin Dad or what?"
 
Anyway, the whole time at the high desert house with 18 people up there... Grampa laid on the couch, THE WHOLE TIME totally detached from everything going on around him... I could barely get him to eat...  I was worried the whole time...  I kinda joked about it saying he was turning into the Grandpa on Willy Wonka Chocolate Factory  [you know how the Grandparents were in the house in bed ALL the time and they NEVER got out of bed]
Well anyway... yesterday Sam's sister took Grampa to the Dr. and she basically told her to take him home and let him die comfortably... she has seen the signs before and basically he is ready to go... I guess Grampa was afraid they were going to hospitalize him... "I want to go home, don't let them keep me, I want to go home"  Tina said at first she wanted them to hook him up to a feeding tube but then she realized its just his time and he is ready to go...
He has lost 22 pounds since June...  He is nothing but skin and bones right now...
Grampa only has 10% of his stomach anyway... He had stomach cancer 35 years ago and they took most of it... So he has to eat every hour a little bit anyway... but he is barely eating now...
 
So... anyway... that is what is going on with Grampa... he was supposed to come here on the 22nd to the 25th... I don't think that will happen now...
 
 When my kids were little, Grampa would show up here at 3am [after going to midnight mass at his house and driving 2 hours to come here] I would then tape pillows to him and help him with his Santa suit, then he would jingle, jingle bells SO LOUD my kids would wake up, then Santa would give them their presents, we would always have a bigger gift like a bike or something in the garage and he would tell them he left it in there... the kids would race to see what it was and they would hear Grampa saying "On Dancer, On Prancer" and so on outside....
So one year we had to sit Kris down at 13 and tell him who Santa was because he was about to get into a fist fight over it... He just knew there was a Santa, he saw him every year and it wasnt his DAD because his DAD was there when Santa was... 
 
These are the things I will fondly remember about my FIL... 

5 comments:

nay0114 said...

OMGosh Kendra you have me bawling. I had no idea. I'm so sorry now that I innocently made the joke earlier about him laying in the yard. The way you describe him I know he would not want to be in a nursing home or hosptial until his time. I'm glad he's going to be right in the middle of everyone as hard as it will be for the rest of the family. You were really lucky to have such an awesome FIL and grandfather for your children. Remember all the good times. Your boys will be crushed. :sigh: Thank you for sharing with us few something so personal to you.
Prayers to you all I hope Grampa is in no pain and goes in his sleep. I wish it was that way for all of us.
Hugs to you all, Chrissie

queeniemart said...

oh i am so very sorry, Kendra. So sad...and tell Sam i am sorry too....it is good that grandpa will be with you or near all of you at this time and he can dictate how he wants it done HIS way and not in a hospital. If you need me, let me know.
LOVE ya

lisa

imgr8phil said...

I'm sorry to hear that it is only a matter of time.  It's also not the best time of year to go, Christmas.  But we can't pick and choose that.  I hope he is comfortable and can relax at home until the end comes.  On a different note, Marla is hot huh?  LOL  I think I may need a nurse. LOL  Take care Chickie!

Phil

eml625 said...

Man, he sounds alot like my Dad. God Bless him Kendra, I know how hard this is for you guys.
Your in my thoughts, and i'm a phone call away...
love ya
Ellen

ktchu9 said...

Oh Kendra, what would I do without you sista, my friend and my family. I just want you to know that without you to help me through this I would be a lost soul.  I know that he is ready. I know this will be hard to let go of that era.  Thanks Sam for sharing your dad, my uncle, who kept my fathers spirit alive in my heart, that to,  will be lost............but i won't say goodbye, I will just have to say i'll see you later!

May all my love surround you all.......Pam